Folks, I'm struggling.
I'm struggling with my health and my self-image.
Since my surgery, my body has changed in so many ways.
If you're a guy or squimish...move on because I'm going to lay it all out.
I have a scar that goes from hip to hip.
I have a 2 scars above that.
2 more below that.
I have a scar over my belly button.
I have a scar over my right breast.
Since my surgery, I cough constantly. I'm on about 11 medications.
Steroids, inhalers, reflux medications, cough suppressants....you name it.
I'm a mess.
I don't feel pretty or sexy.
I don't want my husband to see my body.
My hormones are out-of-whack.
I cry sometimes.
I look at all my scars and I want to cry....and often do.
I've gained weight because I've not had the strength to exercise since May.
I make excuses to not exercise even a little. Even though I could.
My clothes don't fit and often hurt my scars.
This weekend my husband gave me an extremely genuine and thoughtful compliment.
I dismissed him. Said it wasn't true.
He looked hurt and said, "Do you honestly think I'd lie to you?"
So how do you get past an illness or surgery?
I know it takes time physically,
but emotionally--how do you get past what your body has gone through?