Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Parenting and Such

Phewww. I had a rough Mommy day yesterday. I'm not sure what was going on with my youngest (Sassypants), but I ended up in tears on the drive to school. 

Her behavior is greatly affected by the foods she eats. If she eats the foods she allergic to, she gets really whiny and defiant. She's getting to bed at a decent time, so I feel she's not overly tired. I need to double check with her school to see if she's getting some sort of corn syrup or food dyes. 

The trouble I run into is I can be a "reactionary" parent. In other words, the more my kids try to gain control, the more aggressive I get. Not in a violent or physical way, but I raise my voice and yes, often act as childish as they do. I think we both feel so out of control at that point that nothing fixes the situation. 

I had to pull out a wonderful parenting book yesterday and re-read some chapters.

Are you a parent and have threatened, given time-outs, punished, spanked, bribed, yelled, etc. and aren't getting positive results? Do you feel defeated after an hour of struggling to keep your child in a 5 minute time-out? 

Or have you done like I did yesterday?---yelled and threatened, knowing that nothing positive came out of it. If so, I highly recommend this book. 

The author, Amy McCready is the founder of Positive Parenting Solutions, Inc. and gives incredibly empowering tips on how to regain a sense of peace between parent and child. 

The first chapter explains how our societal and family changes have caused parenting styles to change. Have you ever said, "When I was a kid, I just got "the look" and knew I better do what my mom said." It's not that easy anymore.

Here's a rundown of the chapter titles:

  1. Something’s Not Working
  2. Kids are People, Too
  3. Are You Making Your Child’s Behavior Worse?
  4. Bringing Out the Best in Your Child
  5. The Power and the Struggle (and Some Solutions)
  6. Using What You Can Control to Manage What You Can’t
  7. The Positive Side of Misbehavior (Learning Life’s Lessons)
  8. The Four Mistaken Goals of Misbehavior
  9. Sibling Rivalry
  10. Bringing Everyone Together
  11. Taking the Toolbox Home

I love that the author suggests that we treat our children with respect. So much of the behavior solutions are temporary on "Super Nanny" and similar tv shows. I remember seeing where the nanny told a misbehaving child that she was naughty and to sit in the "naughty spot". 

Is that really constructive? I tried the whole time-out thing many times and it didn't work. Instead I felt like my children believed that they were naughty and need to continue that type of behavior. After all, they had the title of "naughty" to live up to.

This morning was much better. I got the girls up in plenty of time to spend some one-on-time with each of them. Parenting......the toughest job on Earth.

Enough of the intense stuff. LOL

My girls love this sing along book and CD by Lisa Loeb. It's titled Lisa Loeb's Silly Sing-Along: The Disappointing Pancake and Other Zany Songs

  • Our favorite songs are "The Disappointing Pancake" and "A Co Di By Doze (A Cold in My Nose)".
  • My only complaints: On the song "Found a Peanut", she talks about choking on a peanut, dying, she went to heaven, and was turned away. She said she "went the other way". Luckily she says she wakes up from a dream. Catchy tune, but I usually skip this song.
  • "Sippin' Cider" talks about how a boy and girl where sitting cheek to cheek sipping cider. Something happens and the straw slips and then they were "lip to lip". Then she says that got her a mother-in-law and a bunch of kids that call her "Ma". I skip this song too.
Hope everyone is having a fantastic Wednesday!


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  2. Thanks for the information. I will be looking on amazon tonight for the book. Sibling rivalry is OOC in our house and I need all the help I can get.

  3. We have food allergies at our house, too. Totally understand how that can turn the day upside down. Great info on this post, thanks!

  4. Sorry you had such a rough morning :-( I haven't begun to read any parenting books yet, but I'll add this one to my list. And thanks for the song recommendations! I've been on the lookout for new music to play for Joe. This is one of the reasons why I like iTunes - I can pick and choose which ones to download. Will definitely avoid the 2 songs you mentioned!

  5. omg that parenting book looks so interesting - I don't even have kids and I'd still be interested in reading it!